Though some of us are naturally gifted with the gift of self-confidence, to a lot of us, it doesn't come so naturally. The way we relate to ourselves is the way we relate to others, and how others are going to relate to us, so it can start playing parts in our careers, in our love life, in our friendships. We need to make sure we got our own backs. And that can take a little, or a lot, of time and effort. To acknowledge that we can use some direction in that, we often wait till the eleventh hour, but when seeking guidance on the quest to self-love, you want to cross paths with people like Noeska Pak sooner rather than later.
In one of her blogs, Noeska talks about the 10.000 hour rule. Research has shown that top talents are not at the top because they are born that way, but because they invested so much time in their passion. And, as Noeska says, self love can be mastered by anyone, as long as we invest in it enough. Sounds promising. We would love to hear where to begin. We would love to hear where Noeska began. She has been on quite the journey herself. We’re discussing a happy new year of being, loving and working with your best self.
What is your mantra right now?
What I do is why I am on earth.
And what is that exactly? How do you describe what you do for a living?
I am a coach and an entrepreneur in a start-up called Spiritual Rebel. As a coach I work both online and, preferably, offline. I help people with their limit beliefs, so they will experience less stress, see more opportunities and, in the end, live from their heart more. Become themselves more. My way of coaching is a way to self-acceptance.
How do you integrate mindfulness and spirituality into your business?
- No more than three to do’s in one day. I always make it and I never feel like my day wasn’t productive. Also, I take time for meditation, yoga, and short walks. After work comes rest.
- When I work together with my associates (which we don't do full-time, very mindfully), we start the day by checking in with each other, just to more or less know what’s going on in each others lives, personally as well as professionally.
- We also make sure we speak our minds to clear the air. Every small irritation or unclarity we throw on the table to discuss.
- We usually end the day with a round of appreciation, which reminds us of why we work with each other.
All in all, we take a lot of time for the bond we have with each other. It’s essentially about cooperating. You don’t ever want to stop focussing on that.
Your entrepreneurial mindset seems to have gotten you very far in life. Has that inner flame ever worked against you?
Of course! My drive and enthusiasm definitely have their pitfalls. On my 27th I experienced signs of a burn out. And still, even though I know I won’t let it come that far, I can go a little too fast. I need to blow the whistle and slow myself down every once in a while. Apart from that I can see the meaning in everything, my glass is always half full, which also has the pitfall of making me a little naive. But even that’s something I’ve come to appreciate.
What has been the obstacle that you are most proud of to triumph?
My urge to please. It was pretty extreme. I was afraid of rejection or losing connection if I wouldn’t do everything for everyone. I can now choose for myself and do things for others purely out of love, not to feel good myself. And I can say no if something doesn’t feel good. ‘I love you but no’ is what I usually say then.
If you look at yourself, 10.000 hours ago, what would you tell yourself?
It’s not about becoming the new Buddha or being perfectly mindful. It is about accepting yourself just the way you are. It is not about having no fear, but it is about not being afraid of your own fear. So trust the progress baby, trust. You are magic anyway.
If you could pick three words to describe the journey of becoming who you are today, what would they be?
Accepting what is.
Is there one specific moment where you felt you ‘flipped the switch’ and changed course in the way you looked at yourself? How did you?
Love this question, because this is what we hope for, right? I used to and a I think a lot of people do. I tried to explain this today to one of my clients. Because it’s not about flipping the switch all at once. You can make yourself wait for that moment, but it’s not going to happen like that. It happens a little by little, day by day. That is the only way to change, to fundamentally change. To feel, be aware and be present with every small little step you take. And day after day you’ll feel a little more self love than the day before. Yes, there have been transformational moments in reading books, meditation, breathing sessions and other body work. But it is much more about a feeling of growth than one spiritual or intellectual insight or eye-opener.
Why do you think self love is so important?
That’s where it all starts. When you love yourself, you can truly love others, without filling an emptiness of your own. It’s unconditional and pure. The reason why this is so important is because people with enough self love won’t be able to cause harm in whichever way.
What have you found to be the key to being your best self?
Doing less. It may sound silly, but overfilling our agenda’s actually completely numbs us out. It feels like a quick escape, because there we don’t have to look at what’s happening on the inside. That will catch up with you though. So I think the key to being your best self is to dedicate time and energy to self exploration. Creating space to do less and feel more. Taking time for your emotional well being is just as important as your physical or financial wellbeing.
Do you believe in New Years resolutions? Do you have any?
If you believe in it, it will work. I can’t think of any specific resolutions I have right this moment, because I don’t wait for the new year to set intentions. I do it every day, every week, every month. But it’s perfectly fine to take that opportunity to strive for something, as long as you make sure you do it just for yourself, and also that fully want it. Anything you want half, won’t happen.
We all have our off days. What do you do on days where you just can’t bring it up to be positive?
Let it be. Completely let it be. Find a place for my meditation and pay attention to my emotions or thoughts, even though they are a little darker than usual. They are still a part of me, just like the lighter and more positive parts of me, and they deserve just as much attention.
What is your history with the Juicery?
I know Nathalie (founder) back from when we used to study together and I have seen her develop the Juicery from the earliest stages on. I’ve thought along with all sorts of things, testing recipes, trying food. The night before she opened her first store, I helped sticker every bottle. And after that I actually worked in stores for 1,5 years. I loved helping people to a healthier lifestyle so much, I was half-coaching people. And people loved to come back. I used to have my own business in nutrition back then, and to this day I am still a number 1 fan of the concepts Nath has, and how she wants to spread them.