Let’s face it. These are divisive times. The world is politically charged, and no one can seem to agree on much of anything. Well, we are pretty sure there’s one thing just about everyone can get behind: we’d all like to be having great sex. Are we wrong?
When we are considering what we want for a new year and a new decade, fantastic sex often falls through the cracks. Not because we don’t want it, but many of us tend to focus on career or health or any number of other lofty goals. This year, however, we decided that we are taking sex back, demanding our inalienable right to pleasure. Because we (and you!) deserve it.
So whether you’re in a relationship, happily on your own or looking for love, it’s time to hunker down and have the best year of sex you’ve ever had.
We know it can sound a little unsexy to actually write it down, plan and make sex a priority, but simply shifting your mind-set can actually go a really long way toward getting back on track for great sex. It’s common for many of us to push sexual wellness aside in favour of other seemingly worthier priorities, but we really think it should be at the forefront of our minds. If you’ve been in one relationship for a long time or you haven’t been dating much lately, sex can easily feel less important than everything else that’s taking up your precious time. If you don’t actually invest in your sex life, we can guarantee it isn’t going to change. So when you have the opportunity to have sex, take it. We’d bet you won’t regret it.
Now if you are not in a relationship, you don’t have to power through unfulfilling dates or spend hours swiping on the apps just to get some pleasure. In fact, whether you’re single or in a relationship, you should make sure you are in touch with your own pleasure. You should invest in what makes you feel good. Whether that’s actually figuring out what turns you own, getting some stunning new lingerie that just makes you feel sexier or carving out time for more self-pleasure, it will make future and current sex that much better. Make sure your pleasure is as pleasurable (and frequent!) as it can possibly be.
Though society is getting more and more open, and people are becoming more comfortable with sexuality, it’s still common for many of us to have sexual blocks. If you have these, it’s important to really figure out what your blocks are, confront them and begin the healing process. Seek out a sex therapist or explore a little tantra. Because the mental aspect is just as important as the physical when it comes to sex.
In the same vein, learning about sex can help to amp up your sex life. Studies have actually shown that simply learning about the orgasm gap has actually increased the number of orgasms women achieve during sex. A little studiousness never looked so good, right? Try out a new sex podcast or settle in with a well-reviewed book about sex to expand your knowledge. You can even take a class, if you’re up for it!
And, last but not least, you need to commit to variety and frequency. Deciding on a little exploration and experimentation will make all the sex you have better. It doesn’t have to be something crazy like going to a sex party – though it certainly can be – but even trying out new positions can make things more exciting and pleasurable. And, for once, less is not more. Have more sex to have better sex. What more could you ask for?!